The poetry section is a bit broken. When it's fixed, I'll put this there. Until...

posted 19 January 2003
The poetry section is a bit broken. When it's fixed, I'll put this there. Until then:
Happy

Happy, that's what I am now
Happy, but why does it never last
Happy, everytime that you feel great
Some shit, comes and take it away
Life is so fleeting

Sometimes, I just wish I could die
Right now, when I know that I'm up
I've got, friends who care what I do
I've got, a life that I can be proud of

I know, that at my funeral
They'd be, able to say nice things
I haven't, had a chance to screw up
Haven't blown all of my chances
But I, can see those things coming
Disappointment, is it all downhill from here?

Less friends, as we all move away
Less fun, as my body gives way
Less thought, as my brain loses juice
Death now, before misery claims my youth
I don't, ever want to be old
And I, refuse to be told
That the best is yet to come

Can't see it, the way I could before
Things could, go anywhere from here
Up or down, and it's all up to me
I hope, but will fate still smile on me?
One crash, on one stupid drunk night
One smash, to shatter my skull
Mortal, so weak and defenceless

I'm scared, of the world outside here
Frightened, that my glory is past
Will I, die alone and afraid
Thinking, of these as good old days?
Why must life be so scary now?

I don't need, to have my life planned out
But please, could you show me the way
I need to know the right next step
Onwards, to things I do best
What are they again?

This time, is the time of my life
This place, I know I rule the roost
Outside, it can be anyone's game
Outside, I could go back to being lame
In here, I'm the one that I made
Out there, nobody knows my name
Or what it means to me

Hold me, because now I'm afraid
Tell me, that it'll all be okay
Show me, what my future will be
Show me, that I'll still be happy

Happy, that's what I've never been
Happy, for the first time in my life
Don't make, me give that up yet
I can't, it's too soon to forget

Know me, know that I love you all
Know me, and please catch me when I fall
Love me, because no one else ever may
Love me, before my body gives way
I want to be me now forever
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