Posts tagged “health”
Olay's "Regenerist Eye Derma-Pod Anti-Aging Triple Response System" is just a cream that fills wrinkles with tiny balls. Every claim in the ad is nonsense: skin cells can't be "regenerated," eyes don't "radiate," and you don't need cream to massage your face. All cosmetics ads are like this. Where are the regulations?
After 18 months of worsening night vision, halos, and glowing blobs, I finally have an answer: my eyes are microscopically flat. No treatment, apparently just live with it. At least it's not a brain tumor.
Obama's taken the delegate lead, my eyes are killing me from screen strain, and work was awful. But karaoke at Jason's birthday party helped on all fronts: great people, great laughs, and six feet of screen distance giving my poor eyes a break.
Three resolutions: get my driving licence so I can escape the city occasionally, lose the weight I gained when I moved to SF and take better care of my eyes, and make more time for romance. Not necessarily in that order.
Every morning I perform contradictory maintenance rituals on my body: fighting bacteria here, cultivating it there, drying this, moistening that. There must be a more efficient system. Though sticking my eyes in my armpits seems impractical.
Threw my back out Wednesday and have been hobbling around ever since. Everything in my life changed at once, so who knows the culprit: desk, bed, shuttle, laptop keyboard? Time to find a chiropractor.
Bristol-Myers Squibb donates a dollar to AIDS research every time you light a virtual candle at lighttounite.org. Pass it on.
Sick, soaked, and hoping for no tsunamis.
Lost my dream job Monday, had a wisdom tooth pulled today. Sitting here jobless, bleeding, unable to eat. It can only get better from here.
A bad tooth led to metronidazole, which led to five days of crushing depression and nearly stepping in front of a bus. Turns out prescription antibiotics can do that to you. Our grasp on reality is terrifyingly fragile and subjective. I'm fine now, but it was a close thing.
My dentist has now botched two fillings in three weeks, both requiring emergency root canals. The second woke me at 4am on a Sunday, sending me across London for expensive private treatment. I'm filing a formal complaint with the NHS. My teeth and my wallet are both in ruins.
Had a nightmare dentist visit where the anaesthetic wore off mid-drilling. Wondering if I have a malpractice case. Lawyers, help me out. Also: the "suspicious" passengers removed from a plane were just Asian. Shocking to nobody. The hysteria of their fellow passengers deserves consequences.
Had an emergency root canal Wednesday morning. Not a great way to start the day.
Survived two of four fillings. The nurse was actually good at suction, he didn't bruise my lips, and the anaesthetic kicked in before the drill did. Face still paralysed. Apparently I look like a stroke victim on the tube.
My latest dentist visit revealed three botched fillings and a tooth so destroyed it's basically just a hole. The projected repair costs are astronomical enough that my lifelong justification for sobriety ("at least it's cheaper than drinking") may finally require a spreadsheet to defend. Brush your teeth, kids.
BBC answers Bob's bird question: don't touch dead birds, and only call the Defra helpline under specific circumstances. Turns out Bob did the right thing with his single dead bird. The advice has some ambiguity, but it's good enough for non-grammar nerds.
I've developed an itchy skin reaction and suspect my laundry detergent (Ariel Liquitabs) is the culprit. Switching to Persil non-bio helped, but my wardrobe is still contaminated. Every morning is a gamble. Today was particularly bad, and I'm starting to fear something worse is to blame.
Finally well enough to sit up without falling over and make it into work. Still coughing like a dying goose, but I'll take the win.
Had a brutal flu all week, finally feeling human again just in time to go back to work. Typical. (Update: fever's back. Lame.)
Not good. Sharon has had a major stroke. This is really bad news.
Went to the dentist and got three fillings, partly thanks to swapping booze for fizzy drinks. My teeth are a genetic disaster. Also: why isn't there a review site for doctors and dentists? Restaurants have them. Someone build this with me.
Had the flu since Saturday, missed my own birthday meal. It really, truly sucks. Being sick is boring.
Had a bad cold made worse by taking hayfever meds, which depress the immune system. Rookie mistake. I live and learn, frequently injuring myself along the way.
Came down with sniffles during peak pollen season and now I can't tell if it's hayfever or a cold. Also had a great evening with a friend who works with Matt Lucas, which is pretty damn cool.
Saw Derren Brown live. Entertaining but too obviously trickery for my taste. Also my eyes went severely cross-eyed for half an hour tonight, followed by a headache from hell. If I die of a stroke tomorrow, you've been warned.
I dreamed I almost had sex, but spent the whole time searching for a condom instead. When I realized mid-dream it was a dream and I'd wasted all that time on safe sex precautions, the frustration woke me up. HIV awareness campaigns have ruined even my fantasy life.
Giving up caffeine after hitting unsustainable levels -- 2 litres of Coke and 3 cups of tea in a day and still exhausted. Today was rough with withdrawal headaches on top of an already bad day at work. But it's fading. Tomorrow will be better.
I drink an alarming amount of Yazoo. If it turns out to be bad for me, I'm done for. Worth it though.
Went from baking brownies to being ill again. London is a germfest, I'm a weakling, or both. Not going to the gym this time. Bright spot: a generous donor gave £30 to Gay Geeks, covering a chunk of hosting costs.
Went to the gym. Worked out. Did not die. I'll take it.
Worked myself sick launching a project at work, then decided to hit the gym anyway, dosed up on cold medication. Predictably collapsed on the floor in the middle of a training session, terrified my trainer, and wasted the time of several NHS paramedics. Lesson very much learned.
Went to Meta 9 (good but sweaty) and tried Body Jam, a dance aerobics class full of women and three gay men including me. Nearly killed myself, can barely move, kept going the wrong direction, and I'm absolutely going back next week.
Attempting to quit caffeine cold turkey while on vacation in the tropics. Withdrawal headaches are real and brutal. Possibly having more creative days already, hands seem steadier. Bodies are chemical factories worth optimizing. Happy to add caffeine to my growing list of drugs I'm better off without.
Been ill and binge-reading Something Positive, a webcomic with geek, gay and random humour. Most importantly, it has Choo-Choo Bear the polymorphic chemo-cat. Highly recommended.
Slate's piece on the economics of suicide is full of wild stats: 3% of Americans have attempted suicide, there are 1700+ attempts daily, and failed attempts correlate with a 20% income boost. Genuinely bizarre stuff worth reading.
The long-term benefits of sunscreen are now in doubt, so it's no longer the one tip I'd offer for the future. It's now about as reliable as any other advice I might give.
America's obesity epidemic has a new solution: skip diet and exercise, just buy a $2,295 home defibrillator. It won't prevent the heart attack, just maybe save you from dying of one. Allow 6-8 weeks for delivery, so try not to have a cardiac event before then.
Sick with a cold, raging toothache, and a computer that keeps rebooting. Awful weekend. Then I watched a stranger stop to rescue a worm from the pavement using a twig, and honestly, that fixed everything.
Two links worth your time: an alarm clock that can literally kill you, and a chance to take out Barney and the Teletubbies in surprisingly slick flash animation.
VW's bringing back the camper van with DVD players and auto shift, but it needs to look more like the original to recapture Beetle-style success. Also: caffeine may cure skin cancer, you can arm-wrestle Freud, and one link is just... eeeeeeew.
Dijkstra, one of computing's Newtons, died August 6th largely unreported. Also: people are implanting devices to stop overeating while millions starve in Africa. Eat less. Don't need a gadget for that.
Day 3 at IBM, posting from the office since my accommodation only has dialup. Found a fascinating first-hand account of an epileptic seizure written by the person experiencing it in real time. Beautiful writing, terrifying to imagine witnessing it live.
Coca-Cola's propaganda page is hilarious corporate spin -- sugar doesn't cause hyperactivity, caffeine is just flavoring, etc. The CIA would be proud. Also, Europeans may be part Neanderthal.
Conducting an informal survey on a possible correlation between breastfeeding and sexual orientation. Mail me your age, orientation, and breastfeeding history. Also stumbled on the alarming "Ban Breastfeeding" website while researching. Results forthcoming.
Sick and back at uni. Posts will be sparse for a few days.
Laziness is scientifically good for you. After this vacation, I may be the healthiest person alive.
